Monster in my head

The monsters in my head whisper all night long. ‘Toss her away… Run away. Don’t come back. Cut yourself up’ they keep whispering in my ears. I sing out aloud but their voice even fills the tunes of my favorite songs.

Leaving my baby in her crib, I run into the bathroom, throw myself into the toilet, trying to empty the uninvited guests with the bile like vomit.

‘ A break will do you good’ said my reflection in the mirror, looking at the spit stained woman staring at her weakly.

‘Yes, I need a break’ I tell myself. Wiping away my tears and the sweat, I walk out of the bathroom with a determination. Dialing that number on my phone I say ‘ma.. I need help’.

Postpartum depression is an ugly monster, isolating you from asking help. Reach out, take that break and talk to someone.anyone. don’t let the monster win.

I am writing as a part of the Write Tribe Problogger’s challenge. #WriteBravely #WriteTribeChallenge

13 thoughts on “Monster in my head

  1. Keerthi Vydyula says:

    I have read many article about PPD and recently witnessed my friend(Who is a doctor) advising another friend of our about PPD and not to ignore it when she faces such stress after pregnancy! It was shocking for me to know that such thing exists and people actually overlook about it!

  2. Shalzmojo says:

    PPD is a harsh reality and its sad that in India (thanks to our traditional beliefs) family members pooh pah it away as saying we also brought up kids and never faced this!! Its sad for the child to bear the brunt of the mother’s anguish and its heartbreaking to see the mother go through the hell

  3. Aesha says:

    PPD is a reality, new moms dont accept and then the monster creeps on in your mind. One should ask for help and support. Nice take on the prompt. This awareness needs to be made.

  4. Mahak @babyandbeyondin says:

    Thank you for bringing this up. There is such a stigma in our society about the word “depression” but most women go through PPD in some form or another. Recognizing it and asking for help is the only way to deal with it.

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